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The universe is a banjo.

While sitting in a room of which I didn't feel I belong, I began to drift off to transform into the neuro-montagist that we all sort of become when things get too weird, boring, or lonely.

 I let my thoughts think as they might, hoping a believable excuse to exit would reveal itself in the periphery. Automatic word association, you could say.

 My head spit out scene after scene, thought rockets crashing into thought moons.

I wish they wouldn't have discontinued that bodyspray that I liked so much from Walgreens. (Flashing picture of a stretchy shirt I bought  from Walgreens several months ago as a joke for a friend.) I've never disliked anyone that smokes Lucky Strikes. My father used to smoke Lucky Strikes. I could use a cigarette.

Still no excuse yet.

(An olfactory memory of an old roommate and her sandlewood soap that I loved.) Scenes of melted candle wax on a floor that I forgot to ever clean. Some over-played Cowboy Mouth song. Kissing her in Biloxi during a small tornado. The grey binder of terrible letters that she took the time to organize according to date and align carefully into the metal hoops. Bambubba's prophecy.

The word "arpeggio".

Broken chords. Cord, some old soap opera character. Godzilla. My sister's social security number that I've memorized for no reason. Again, broken chords. Time is like a broken chord played on a banjo. The universe is a banjo.

Cough. "What's that, Ms. Cavalier?", the dead-arc smile of a nurse mouthed into the dispassionate, snappy air of every GYN clinic in the world.

With my feet up in stirrups, and a doctor with his gloved hand rummaging around my (pick your euphenism for vagina if you must, I am a fan of "my mad stash"), I was startled alert from my wandering thinking game to realize that I had just managed to make an embarrassing event (just a little more embarrassing.)

Either it was nerve induced temporary insanity, or I got so comfortable with letting my thoughts think as they might, because

I didn't realize that I had, at some point, started talking out loud.

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Hi Guys, I've made a livejournal for music related business. Please add jean_low when you get a chance. Thanks!
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Here's the thing. I don't have internet right now, and I'm enjoying it. But, just to let you know, oh no, oh my, hm, lskdjfldskjf, and wow. My days have grown quite...artful, I spin and grin.
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Friends Only.  Comment with love and/or a story to be added.  Thanks.
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I am unsure of where to begin. I have a lot of things that I am studying, as an inquisitive autodidactic cajun type that is also attempting to finish a book. This is not my first livejournal. This is just somewhere else to be, some place a little cleaner and unseen.

Some things that I am thinking about:

1. How to implement critical thinking into american educational systems. How to implement the necessity of root analysis without scaring the Christians.
2.  The modern defination of theory of  mind(ToM)-see above link.
3.  Gender theory

Wiki side note:
Many societies categorize all individuals as either male or female—however, this is not universal. Some societies recognise a third gender[6]—for instance, the Two-Spirit people of some indigenous American peoples, and hijras of India and Pakistan[7]—or even a fourth[8] or fifth.[9] Such categories may be an intermediate state between male and female, a state of sexlessness, or a distinct gender not dependent on male and female gender roles. Joan Roughgarden argues that in some non-human animal species, there can also be said to be more than two genders, in that there might be multiple templates for behavior available to individual organisms with a given biological sex.[10]

4. Buckminster Fuller's essay "The Great Pirates".
5. Pervasive disorders, specifically Autism
6. Ouroboros and Higgs Boson
7. How could I lay out 12 human archetypes in relation to quarks and leptons?

8. Micro Intelligience-the ability to view the details of a picture(laws of conduct)
    Meso Intelligience-the small parts of the yin/yang, mediators that implement paradigm shifts
    Macro Intelligience-Views the gestalt(the whole picture) and challenges the laws of conduct
9. "Wahrnehmung" as an 'affective awareness', which is more than mere sense perception. The method toward an affective awareness is through 'ontological understanding'. It forms the principles behind a paradigm, conceived as either the Heraclitean 'flux' (Heraclitus) or the Parmenidean 'one' (Parmenides).
10.The necessity of college level educators  to teach the necessity of intellectual humility and empathy.
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To be without the slightest subject for a book,
is to find yourself, once again, before a book.
A vast emptiness,  a possible book-
before something like living,
 naked writing,
like something terrible, terrible to overcome.

Art can be defined as the moans of a language freeing itself from its symbols, rebelling against the systems that keep the old way intact.

It is an important job, indeed. There are those of us who are in charge of bringing order to the system, and those of us who are in charge of examining the condition of that system.

A fully trained artisan has been exiled from a community, tied to a tree, exposed. He/she has transcended beyond gender, but for the sake of simplicity-we will refer to an artist as 'he' for now.

He has challenged the order of his surroundings, he has fought to create his reflections anyway. He has fought to understand the brilliant things that he sees. He learns to manipulate his small truths, and to mute out the crowd of No.

He studies patterns and relationships. He has the ability to see one and two as the same. The individual and the society are both respected and considered.

This is macro intelligence.

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